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Sunday, December 18, 2005

The Wonderful Wit of the Welsh...!

My parents have a treasure trove of books which I never make full use of, but I found this gem today - 'Welsh Wit and Humour' by D. Byron Evans. (No "Oh the Welsh have a sense of humour do they" jokes!!)

Here's some excerpts....

"The following are the aftermath of people talking in their second language, English, while thinking in their first language, Welsh....

I can't come tonight because we'vegot strange people coming here.

How is your sister? Is she still in bed?
Oh yes, she's still in bed. But she's standing on her sitting now.

The Deacon, well versed in the ways of colonialism, decided to give the chapel's weekly announcements in English because a single Englsih visitor was present. He cleared his throat and told the packed chapel, 'Now we will take the collection,' he said, 'John Parry will go to hel this side and William Davies will go to hel that side. Please note that the preacher for next Sunday is hanging in the porch...Now I'd better leave it at that before I make a muck of it.'
(Hel is the Welsh word for 'collect')

Giving direction to the Englishman...
'Turn left and you'll be right'

An English newcomer wanted to know what was going on in the local chapel. It was a temperance meeting, but he was told 'It's a sing song against the beer'.

As the fly crows.

Train to Heathrow then a test tube there.

The BBC sympathy orchestra.

Slightly more seroius....a story about a talk by Revd Stephen Jenkins...

"At the monthly meeting in Havefordwest, things were dragging along and the speakers could not get any hwyl into the proceedings. the chairman called on Stephen to say a few words.
'I remember some time ago my friends,' he said, 'that a preacher came to Crundale on the Saturday afternoon, a little earlier than expected. The farmer and his wife, where he was to stay, were very busy. The mistress went to put the kettle on, but the tin can was empty. 'Here Mary,' she said to the maid, 'Run to the well as fast as you can.' When the mistress went to put water in the kettle on the maid's return, there wasnt a drop in the can. What was the matter? Was the well dry? No! There was plenty of water in the well. Was the tin can leaking? No! What was the matter then? SHE PUT THE TIN CAN IN THE WELL WITHOUT TAKING THE LID OFF!! It seems to me, friends, that we in this meeting are as dull as Mary. We've come to the Well of Salvation with our tin cans withut taking the lids off!'"

Aren't the Welsh just simply wonderful....? (The answer, by the way, as if there was ANY doubt, is YES!)


Blogger Timmy C said...

Aren't the Welsh just wonderfuly simple....?

I coulnd't have put it better myself ;)

1:33 AM  

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